An Appropriate Reaction: Complaint Letter to Costa
Originally written many moons ago and never sent, sadness.
Dear Costa
I happened to be journeying upon my regular route to work one winter’s morn when which a frightful thirst came upon me. It was one which a quenchable drink was the only thought upon my crown, and as the journey continued I yearned for something special. On this day, I ran through the list of questionable drinks in my head as I commanded; “What drink should I choose?!”
As I descended upon the hospital foyer, certainly a regal entrance for the building, I was greeted by the lights of Costa. I thought back to any brief time I have spent upon its grounds and recalled a vague memory of iced coffee. I thought to myself; “Can this be?? A drink of my choosing being just feet away from me?” It certainly felt like the perfect beverage for me at that time; cold, refreshing, adding a bounce to my step that a hot drink could not touch.
I approached the woven barrier to become trapped upon the queue like a rabid animal. And patiently waited whilst monitoring the menu, excitedly deciding upon what drink to select to become mine. It is well known throughout the land of the hospital grounds that Costa is a busy place to be, and hence waiting in the queue may take some time. I felt this was worth it to obtain the drink of my choice.
During this time I observed the staff were rather stressed with the workload, and I pitied them as I recalled this feeling within myself. They clearly cared about their job, but there were simply not enough of them to cope with demand. The queue behind me sighed loudly with impatience and I would imagine this feeling was conveyed to the poor worker bees who were already all too aware at the bustle awaiting them.
I remained patient however as I anticipated the cool, delicious iced drink slithering down my throat, my belly singing with overjoyed caffeine, my head alight with the aroma of coffee…. with a kick. Finally, as if an alien spacecraft had chosen me as the forefather of a new species, I was chosen to be served. With great triumph I stated proudly; “Iced latte please”. To be told; “We have no ice.” There was a momentary silence as my dreams crashed to the ground, splintering the core. There was nothing anyone could do. The server apologised and I weakly replied; “It’s okay”.
I slumped and dragged my deflated body into work and began my day, with not the sparkle I had hoped for.
So in conclusion, I couldn’t have the drink I asked for. So I propose the following:
Signage to suggest lack of ice
Signage to inform that iced drinks cannot be served rather than advertising them
Installing an ice machine
Reconsidering serving iced drinks
Closing down all Costa aside from Canada, Norway and Alaska.
Renaming Costa to ‘Hot Costa’
Sincerely,
An unhappy Belle.